238 Reasons We Love America

by Howie Decker @HowardTheDeck

Happy Birthday America!

 

On July 4, 2014 America celebrates its 238th birthday. Before celebrating, we take a look at 238 reasons we love this great nation.

Mind you, these aren’t ALL the reasons, so if we left something off it doesn’t mean we don’t love it.

We realize other fine countries may have played some part in bringing us some of the items on this list, but whether it was made in America, lives in America, or is otherwise seen, heard, served or sold in America – it was eligible to be on this list.

238. Team USA

237. Stephen Amell’s workout videos

236. Ghostbusters

235. bacon-wrapped cheddarwurst

234. the drive-in

233. parades

232. Saturday Night Live

231. American Horror Story

230. Quentin Tarantino

229. The Regal Beagle

Best place in town to have a weekly misunderstanding.

228. fireworks

227. hashtags

darth vader hashtag

226. Pebble Beach Golf Links

225. the ’57 Chevy

224. Ron Swanson

223. The Wire

222. Frank’s Red Hot

221. Garbage Plates

Best when served with #222.

220. game shows

219. Schmidt

218. Mystery Science Theater 3000

217.  apple pie

 Even though blueberry, pumpkin, & pecan are better.

216. DVD box sets

215. going back to South Fork

214. The Golden Girls’ lanai

213. Trunk Club

212. The Apollo Theatre

211. Elizabeth Banks

210. Fenway Park

209. Stitcher Radio

208. Bacon sundaes

Even if you never try one, or think they’re disgusting – it’s nice to know that restaurants are trying to bring us variety.

207. The Wiener Mobile

206. Shivakamini Somakandarkram

205. happening upon extra change left in vending machines

204. Alec Baldwin

Although it weirds us out when we see him in anything other than a suit.

203. Jem and the Holograms

202. holograms

201. The Puffy Shirt

200. Xavier Roberts

The Cabbage Patch Kids were so good that we won’t hold him accountable for The Furskins.

199. Experimental Doritos Flavors

Remember the ‘Toasted Corn’ flavor that came in the yellow bag? You can still get them in Hawaii.

198. the Dodge Ram

197. Freddy Kreuger

196. Jason Voorhies

195. E.T.

194. podcasts

193. gas station boiled peanuts

192. Big League Chew

Had to choose one to represent all of the worthy candidates including Bubble Tape, Freshen Up, and Fruit Stripe

191. Augusta National

190. The General Lee

189. K.I.T.T.

188. Andy Richter

187. Voodoo Doughnut

186. Homage.com

Greatest t-shirts in the world.

185. collectors’ clubs

184. Jurassic Park

183. Stephen Colbert

182. SportsCenter

181. Ariana Grande

180. Roger Corman

179. Janina Gavankar

178. Six Seasons and a Movie

177. The Sopranos

176. Chicago-style pizza

175. Friday Night Lights

The book, the movie, the show, AND the tradition.

174. Netflix

173. amusement parks

172. MLB Extra Innings

Ending the century-old tradition of growing up an automatic-fan of the closest baseball team.

171. Stephen King

170. Ready Player One

169. J Crew

168. the bikini wax

Just don’t mention this if you’re at #191.

167. board games

166. satellite radio

165. the day after Thanksgiving

164. microwaves

163. Kristen Wiig

162. NYC Toy Fair

161. energy drinks

Our one stop shop for caffeine, calories & cavities!

160. The Cowboys & Lions playing every Thanksgiving

159. Hanna Barbera

158. Robot Chicken

157. Alison Brie

156. playoffs

155. funny TV commercials

154. our Olympic athletes

153. Sesame Street

152. San Diego Comic Con

151. New York-style pizza

150. Masters of the Universe

149. Times Square

148. comic book publishers

147. Rock and Roll

146. grand openings

145. good stand up comedy

144. Howard Stern

143. The JC Penney Catalog (until 1989)

142. Abraham Lincoln

The President, not the vampire hunter

141. The final shot of every ‘The Simpsons’ opening title sequence

140. Louis CK

139. over-doing things

138. The Dharma Initiative

137. Martin Scorsese

136. fast food

135. road trips

From Kerouac to the Griswolds, America’s roads are a blast to travel. Just don’t order the french toast from Horatio Sans.

134. 80s TV theme songs

133. The Avengers

132. Will Ferrell as Alex Trebex

131. the ice cream truck

130. Mr. T

129. yard sales

128. Night Court

Wildly underappreciated sitcom from the greatest sitcom era in TV history.

127. NASCAR

126. Rachel, Monica & Phoebe

125. The Terminator

124. state fairs

123. Superman

122. Robocop

121. Archer

120. movie popcorn

119. one-hit wonders

118. Kenny Powers

117. shopping malls

116. online shopping

115. Sports Illustrated

Specifically, the Swimsuit Issue. Introducing us to such greats as Elle MacPherson, Stephanie Seymour & Kathy Ireland.

114. 90s R&B

113. Wonder Woman

112. The Second City

111. Garbage Pail Kids

110. supervillains

109. Saturday morning cartoons

108. funny women

107. Jack Kirby

106. Broadway

105. sequels

For every Empire Strikes Back or Toy Story 3 there’s a Speed 2, but either way, it’s nice to know they’re coming.

104. our pets

103. miniature golf

102. Morgan Freeman’s cadence

101. Ninja Turtles

100. Rucker Park

99. South Park

98. Icees from Target

97. the beach

96. cheese steaks

95. Scratch-off Lottery tickets

94. the walk-off

93. Ed O’Neill

92. Brain Games

91. Hot Wheels & Matchbox cars

90. the live studio audience of Cheers

89. Crowdfunding sites

Kickstarter, indiegogo, New Jelly, Rockethub, and many more.

88. arcades

87. The Channel 4 News Team

86. Nathan’s Hot Dogs

85. Slip n’ Slides

84. Weird Al

83. needing a bigger boat

82. not Penny’s boat

81. Ellen

80. Madison Square Garden

79. The fact that Jose Canseco is still swinging for the fences

78. fads

77. Route 66

76. Ralph Kiner

75. Bill Cosby

74. improv

73. monuments

72. smashed up crackers in chili

71. Justin Timberlake’s impression of Michael McDonald

70. passing the important things on to our children

69. Rocky Balboa

68. BLTs

67. Vin Scully

66. HBO

65. Chevy Chase

64.  The Grand Canyon

63. kid-owned & operated lemonade stands

62. movies set in Las Vegas

61. non-use of the metric system

60. the ‘impact’ font

59. Eddie Murphy

58. making fun of Jay Leno

57. Nickelodeon

56. The RedZone channel on NFL Sunday Ticket

55. Hostess

Twinkies, Cupcakes, Ho-Hos, Ding Dongs, Fruit Pies. Stop looking at the Nutritional Facts.

54. The Greatest American Hero

53. Jack Nicholson

52. The Groundlings

51. sidekicks

50. Mad Men

49. Pixar

48. tailgating at football games

47. the summer blockbuster

46. Harrison Ford

45. Mad Magazine

44. Pepsi-Cola

43. Wiffle Ball

42. mash ups

41. Marilyn Monroe

40. Monday Night Football

39. Steven Spielberg

38. The NBA

37. Facebook

36. CM Punk

35. Navy Seals

34. Christmas songs

33. Chipotle

32. inventors

Henry Ford, Thomas Edison, Slick Rick, Steve Jobs, Jim Henson, Vince McMahon

31. anything 8bit

30. unplugging it and plugging it back in to fix it

29. Iron Man

Superman & Captain America represented America in the 1900s. Tony Stark embodies 21st century America.

28. the DVR

27. Jon Stewart

26. Lonely Island

25. Playboy

24. Jay-Z

23. Twitter

22. Kate Upton

21. Nike

20. The internet

Because we could be in China.

19. Jack Daniels

18. Arrested Development

17. The Muppets

16. Halloween

15. Microsoft

14. G.I. Joe (A Real American Hero)

13. Buffalo wings

12. Sarah Silverman

11. Batman

10. Fantasy Sports

9. Disney

8. March Madness

7. Mitch Hedberg

6. The Constitution

5. Apple

4. Star Wars

3. The NFL

2. something for everyone

1. the ‘good old days’

When everything was better. Just think – in 25 years, right now will be the next generation’s ‘good old days’. They don’t have it half as good as we did.

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